REFLECTION
When I think of the word 'reflection' I automatically think of my past experiences/situations that have happened to me and think what went right/what went wrong etc.
Definitions I had found of said word were:
1. an image in a mirror, on a shiny surface, on water, etc
2. the action or process of sending back light, heat, sound etc. from a surface
oxfordlearnersdictionaries
The first definition of reflection never once came into my mind.. interesting point there. I wonder why that is?
One of my AOLs is: Rejection
An example of this was when I didn't get that promotion from my current job or getting cut from an audition.
In my teens year looking at myself and nit picking everything I didn't like about myself or questioning why I didn't look like all the girls around me.
When then leads to my point of a sense of negativity, constantly comparing, wishing I had what the other 'successful' girls had.
Back at the start again trying to pick yourself up to try again, telling yourself you got this.
Being grateful for even turning up, getting into the room full of casting directors. One peer of mine told me that she treats auditions like an extra class. Once I heard her say that it changed my perspective on auditions.
Very early on in my research for possible AOLs I came across a TedTalk called ‘Success, failure, and the drive to keep creating’ which made me think as to why I keep on trying and being presistent in my field and to not give up on my dreams. In the TedTalk Elizabeth Gilbert described what it was like after the success of her first book and how when she released her second book it wasn't as successful and she talks about her journey and how she felt from releasing both of her books and how she managed to uplift herself after the second release.
“you love what you do more than you love failing at it”.
This resonated with me as I have to say to myself that this audition for that potential job just wasn't for you. Maybe you weren't what they were looking for for example height, hair colour, body shape. I also have to remind myself that things take time and don't take your failures personally have to look at it as a new direction you're going into .
I would love to know other people's thoughts on this?
Portia
xoxo
Hi Portia!
ReplyDeleteI love the way you are reframing the way you think about what you might have once viewed as "failure". I'm starting to try and adapt my thinking in a similar way. I try to think about whether I feel like I've let myself down, or if more so I think I've let others down, or not met their expectations. Sometimes the pressure we feel to succeed can come more from external sources, family, friends, colleagues and teachers, than from within ourselves. I think separating ourselves from those external pressures makes us more accepting of our "failures".
Rosie x
Hi Rosie,
DeleteSpeaking from experiences I think reframing the way I think about ''rejection'' and ''failure'' has really helped me to push through and continue what I love to do. I can relate when you mentioned about letting people down. In the past I always found that I was always trying to be the best ''friend'', ''sister'' ,''daughter'' and ''employee''. This is something I'm still trying to figure that out.. I'm learning to be enough.
A peer of mine told me once that she views ''failure'' as when you have completely given up, if you are always trying at whatever it is and you have never given up, you succeeded every second you keep trying.
This has really helped me when I have felt low.
Portia
xoxo
Hi Portia, just catching up on Blogs and your AOL on rejection I can relate to at a time of when performing was the focus of my career. I think its really positive you are looking from a different perspective and not to view these 'failures' as something personal to you, and to take a more open approach and use these experiences as a form of growth and transition. Your experience of these auditions could also lead onto a conversation about ethics and how performers are expected to look a certain way instead of promoting individuality. Looking forward to following more on your blog, Sophie x
ReplyDeleteHi Sophie,
DeleteI feel as performers it is hard to not make it our only focus as we love what we do so much it doesn't feel like an occupation. I have never considered looking at this angle of how performers are expected to look a certain way instead of promoting individuality.
Thanks, I will look more into that!
Portia
xoxo
Hi Portia,
ReplyDeleteReally enjoyed reading your post on reflection. It can be a cruel thing to reflect on past experiences because we are conditioned to beating our selves up about it if the outcome wasn't what we hoped. Love that you're reframing your way of thinking about it. I will take a leaf out of your book for sure!
Hi Indiana,
DeleteI found that once I reframed that idea it made me realise ways to overcome that fear of being rejected. Which leads me to think how else can reframe the fear of being rejected. Fear can be a great motivator and pushes you to the next level and that is when you can see your limitations. For example going to auditions I would be so scared to dance in front of agents/directors etc because I was scared it made me want to be that much better.
I do believe that fear gears you intro greatness.
Portia
xoxo